What Is A Grandmother?

The document information on this piece reads 2001.  Regretfully, I did not cite the origin of the little essay except for the fact it was written by a third grade student.  I’d say, an observant third grader, and probably a girl, but it could be a boy.  Enjoy.  If you don’t have any recitationsready for this coming Sunday, please feel welcome to use it.

What is a Grandmother? 

         A grandmother is a lady who has no children of her own.  She likes other people’s little girls and boys.  A grandfather is a man grandmother.  He goes for walks with the boys and they talk about fishing and stuff like that.

Grandmothers don’t have to do anything except to be there.  They’re so old that they shouldn’t play hard or run.  It is enough if they drive us to the market where the pretend horse is, and have lots of dimes ready.  Or if they take us for walks, they should slow down past things like pretty leaves and caterpillars.  They should never say “hurry up.”

Usually, grandmothers are fat, but not too fat to tie your shoes.  They wear glasses and funny underwear.  They can take their teeth and gums off.

Grandmothers don’t have to be smart, only answer questions like, “Why isn’t God married?” and “How come dogs chase cats?”

Grandmothers don’t talk baby talk like visitors do because it is hard to understand.  When they read to us they don’t skip or mind if it is the same story over again.

Everybody should try to have a grandmother, especially if they don’t have a television, because they are the only grown-ups who have time.

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2 Comments

  1. Glenda

    This makes me smile every time I read it, Karyl! Thank you for giving me those smiles today! 🙂

  2. What? Funny underwear?? Hmph.

    This is really good, Karyl. And you can tell it’s old, because no pretend horse runs for only a dime these days–I’ve met all the ones in our area. They’re greedy.

    And my youngest grands still have a hard time realizing that I’m their mommy’s mommy.

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